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My cat: Does he understand me or is it OCD?

Meet Boots:

My pet sitter/co-worker took this picture with her phone, that's why the quality is bad, but I felt this reflected his personality the most. He is a little love bug and looks at himself in the mirror all the time.

I adopted Boots, along with his brother Whiskers, back Jan 1, 2006.  They were terrified of everything, but warmed up to me quickly when I got sick and was home in bed for 3 days.  Once they know you, they are the sweetest cats you could ever meet.

Whiskers went to the rainbow bridge in 2011 and Boots hangs here entertaining me or demanding my attention with drive by attacks when I'm on the computer too much.

Boots was around 5 when I got him, so he's around 13 now.  He had Hyperthyroidism, which I treated in 2007.  I found out last year that Mr. Boots has stage 3 kidney disease and a kidney stone.  My vet, The Cats Meow, basically said that surgery would do more harm than good.  We can treat the urinary tract infections as they come up and manage the pain as needed.

Cat people know what that means, I get to watch the litter box very closely.

When it come to Boots, when I don't behave right he pees on the carpet.  When I travel, even though he loves Genice, he will pee on the carpet right by the front door.  "How dare you leave me mama!"   Also, if I let things get cluttered he stops peeing in the box.

If I change litters, (I know, I  know...Cat manual page 1) he will pee right outside the box.  Honestly, this change was all about me!  I thought that since I use Tidy Kat I could get the light stuff.  You know, the one where women are throwing it to each other in the commercials. I'm thinking "It's the same brand, no problem."  I live on the 3rd floor, of a walk up building and it makes my life a little easier.

Boots hated the idea, he will poop in the box and pee on the floor.  The litter is very dusty and makes him sneeze when he scratches in it.  I mixed some other litter he has used before and he had no problem with it previously, but no improvement.

So yesterday, I sat this little face down and explained that if he didn't start peeing in the box he was going to have to see the vet to make sure there isn't something wrong.  

This morning I check and sure enough he peed IN the box.  That little boy understood exactly what I said, or did he?

Yesterday, I finally got the donations building up in the living room out and into my car. So, it could also be because he is a little OCD and wanted that stuff out of the house.   My boy has attitude! 

Either way, he is using the box again!!!

Time to restock on my Sportzyme to get the pee out of the carpet and sub-flooring.  I love that stuff.  It works with the smell, but it takes time usually 2-3 days.  It is environmentally safe and Kitty safe.

Go to my website if you are interested in ordering some.  The link is BrendaJenkins.norwex.biz -Home Essentials - Sportzyme

My Bucket List

I have never written down my bucket list before, but I've made more than my share of lists.

1. Get my passport - in case I have to suddenly leave the country.
2. Go on a wellness retreat
3. Take an Alaskan Cruise
4. Take a tropical cruise - Virgin Island
5. Tour Castles in England
6. Tour Castles in Ireland
7. New Zealand
8. Australian Cruise
9. Greece
10. Tour Italy
11. See all the Hawaiian Islands
12. Florida Keys
13. New England in the Fall
14. Fallingwater in PA
15. Travel Across Canada
16. North Carolina
17. Visit all the national parks
18. Drive the entire west coast
19. Scotland
20. Germany
21. Switzerland
22. Norway
23. Hike the Grand Canyon
24. Parasail
25. Take a helicopter tour of Maui
26. Zipline
27. Climb a rock wall
28. See a Ballet
29. See an Opera
30. Raise my credit score to over 800
31. Vacation on the Texas Coast
32. See New Orleans as a tourist
33. Pass the CPA exam
34. Take photography classes
35. Be debt free
36. Take cooking classes
37. Go kayaking
38. Go paddle boarding
39. Wear a size 10 again
40. Wear a bathing suit again
41. Go to Catalina Island
42. Fall in Love
43. Buy a house with land around it
44. Retire
45. Look in the mirror with nothing but love

What's on your bucket list?

Face to Face with Myself

Face to Face with Myself

Every morning I get up and allow myself 30 minutes to an hour with God, before work.  On the weekends this could last for hours.  I get up, feed my cat, pick him up and hold him like a baby and kiss his head.  He used to hate this, but I think has learned that it is love not torture.  I make my coffee, grab my journal and blanket, if I need it, and I sit on my balcony.  Being outside I feel like there is a more direct connection with my Creator.  Making this part of my daily routine I believe is key to my changing self perception.

This is a time when I thank God for all He's given me, big and small things.  I ask Him to walk me through each day and to just do His will.  This is important because I lived my life until 4 years ago on self-will run riot.  Everything was about me, what do I need to do for you to like me?  What will it take to make this pain inside stop?  There was never enough of anything to stop the pain and fear from running my life.  

The only place I felt like I knew what I was doing was at work.  My knowledge and skills are strong, but there was that voice in my head telling me that I was never good enough, smart enough, pretty enough...enough.  I had to finally say "ENOUGH!"  I can't live this way anymore.  I said "Enough!" 7/18/2010, after losing my mother a year earlier and the pain was so great I had to turn my life over to someone other than myself.  I was terrified and didn't know how to do this, but I found people who had been where I was and they are living a life I want to live.  I just did what they did and my life got better.

1. I started developing my relationship with God.  I took a few years before I started spending this much time with Him.  Just talking to Him in the beginning was a huge step for me.  

2. I had to stop judging myself and others.  I have these great expectations of myself.  Completely unattainable.  If I hold myself to them I hold you to them too.  I had to stop and when I did, for the most part I stopped, it is human nature. I found that I was more relaxed, had more energy and without judgement there is room for love. My self love ebbs and flows.  It flows more freely now than ever.

 3. Forgiveness is so hard sometimes and seems unjust in some cases, but it is the magical thing that will set you free.  Forgiveness is what opened my heart back up after being locked down since age 6.  I had to forgive a man that abused me when I was 6 years old.  I spent 40 years angry and fearful.  I was really pissed off when I found out the key to getting out of that hole was to forgive him.  I took time and prayers to get to where I could forgive him.  I had to see he is a sick man and has to answer for his actions to a higher power then me.  In October 2011, I sat across from him and made amends for my retaliations on him and in my heart I forgave him.  The miracle of forgiveness is I am no longer angry or fearful.  My soul is lighter and I have greater capacity to love myself and others.

4.  I look at myself in the mirror and find something that I love about myself.  Each time I do that I build trust with myself.  I have spent my life saying mean and horrible things to myself.  Things I would never say to anyone.  I have to forgive myself for those harms done and make amends by not continuing to do those things  This image below symbolizes hope to me.  I have come a very long way, but it is an ongoing journey that I have chosen to share with you.

5.  I have to be the kind of person I want to attract into my life. So that is my present journey and not settling for anything less than true love and happiness.  A warm body just won't do anymore!

I love all of you and I love myself!!  I will see you soon!  Thank you for stopping by.

http://www.karmatube.org/videos.php?id=4650     Because I'm Happy

My 10 Favorite Apps

I went for years without converting over to my smart phone.  I held out as long as I could, but finally gave in 3 years ago.  Every year I go through and revisit my expenses and consider giving up my phone for a regular one.  A week ago I walked into the AT&T store to do just that and they cut my bill by $40 a month and I got unlimited calls and texting.  I didn't think the minutes would ever be an issue, but I found out recently that my Dad is a chatterbox and my minutes were running out.

Well, I am glad I got the savings I wanted and I got to keep my phone addiction in tact.  Why do I love my phone so much?  I can access anything I want from it.  It is remarkable.  I think back to before cell phones.  Really, we drove around without being in constant contact.

Anyway, I have a bunch of apps on my phone that help me and I am going to share my favorites and most used with you:

1.  Waze Social GPS -  Not only are the graphics cute, you have other users updating on traffic status. It tells you where there are red light cameras, accidents, other "Wazers" in the area.  I recommend that you have a passenger do the updating for you.  It will ask you if you are a passenger, if you are moving.  The free version is great.

2.  Facebook - It's nice to take a break at work and check up on my friends. You all know about Facebook.

3.  Groupon - This is an awesome App and dangerous if you are a shopaholic with insomnia.  You can shop right from bed.  I have gotten some great deals at 2 and 3 am.

4.  Natursound - There are a wide variety of white noise or nature sound apps.  These help me sleep.  I keep my phone plugged in through the night.  it helps when I am traveling for work.  My favorite sounds are the Ocean or Rain.  I have to say that  before I started meditating on my patio in the mornings, I would get up and rush to get ready and go to work without looking outside.  I would be dressed for rain and it was a clear day.

5.  iTrackbites - This is an app that I actually paid for.  It tracks food with a similar point system to weight watchers, but without the monthly fee.  The app is 3.99 and worth every penny.

6. Restaurant App - this is associated with iTrackbites and it gives nutritional information on virtually every fast food  or other restaurant.  It will track your eating with the iTrackbites app.  It is cute and easy to use.  My favorite food track of all that I have tried.

7.  Audible - I love listening to Audio books on road trips, on my commute, or just doing work around the house.

8.  Jesus Calling - This is my daily devotional and I share it on my facebook account everyday.  It is the first thing I read everyday.  I think it is around $10.  I was given a leather bound copy of this book for Christmas in 2011 and it speaks to my heart.

9.  Pretty Fit - This is a new app, but I absolutely love it.  You get video workouts on your phone.  The problem is I have NO excuse anymore not to exercise.

10.  Blogger - I can post on the fly...Weeeeee

What are your favorite Apps?

I Love Audio Books!!

I love audio books, mainly because I can work around the house or on long road trips I can get in entire books.  I am a bit dyslexic so I read slow, this makes it much easier.  However, I will say that I prefer when the author narrates.  There is nothing worse than a monotone narrator, or that woman that is narrating and trying to do a mans voice when a man speaks.  Ugh...

My favorites are the ones that have helped me grow spiritually or emotionally.  I have done the self help stuff all my life, trying to fix that thing inside that was broken.  Honestly, until I was ready to let go of how I was doing things and DO things differently, nothing was going to work, and it didn't.  That is for another blog post.

My Favorite audio books are:

1. Eat, Pray, Love narrated by Elizabeth Gilbert, the author.  What a journey! I have listened to this book over and over.  I listened to this book when I was finally opening up to letting God take control of my life.    
2. The Power of Vulnerability, by Brene Brown - Recorded Live:  This is a very powerful book that gets to the core of my issues.  I was able to move forward after listening to her insights and facts.  If you are one who wants facts and figures, this is for you.  Brene is a statistics, fact and numbers based person.  She appeals to my logical brain as well as my heart. 

These are my favorites and definitely must reads if you are actively on a spiritual journey.

5 Ways I Get Closer to God

Since I have made these things part of my daily life I have noticed problems are easier to face, forgiveness comes more quickly, I sleep more soundly, I love more deeply and I am starting to trust more freely.  Trust is a difficult thing for me, so any progress in that area is a miracle.

I have two places in my home where I just feel more open to hearing God.  I don't mean an audible voice. I mean my defenses are down, my mind is open and my brain becomes more still.  The noise in my head quiets enough where I can obtain thoughts that are clearly direction from God.  Kind of a tug in a certain direction.  I have learned over time not to ignore those tugs.

1. Coffee with God:  I get up each morning and grab my coffee, my journal and I sit on my balcony. I love sitting outside sipping coffee and being quiet and still.  It's one form of meditation I do.  Even if I am late for work I take this time.

2. Journal:  I started out just journaling what ever was on my mind.  Kind of a data dump of sorts.  It has developed into a conversation with God.  I thank Him for everything and everyone he has put in my life. I ask Him to walk me through my day.  I pray for all my friends and family and anything else he has put on my heart.  My day isn't always awesome, but it IS always easier.  If I skip this in the morning I tend to be a bit of a grouch.

3. Random Acts of kindness:  Paying for the person behind me at Starbucks in the morning, paying someone a compliment, opening the door for someone, or just making someone laugh.

4. Hanging out with my cat:  I swear I have him so that can God can show me what unconditional love looks like.

5.  Meditating before bed surrounded by gifts of love that my friends and family have given me.  I play ocean sounds and ask god to calm my mind as I send love and light out into the universe.